Thursday, March 12, 2009

DESTINY: Make it or take it.

Many moons ago I was in my friends wedding... sitting at the head table, we were all looking on as the best man was giving a very eloquent toast - the man could talk about bread and make it interesting, and this awesome couple made it very easy to speak to their love and their future. He wrapped up his speech by saying that their meeting and blossoming love was "destiny!"

It was followed immediately by ::kerrrbloop... kerrrbloop::

The top two tiers of their cake chose that moment to be one with the floor.

Luckily we all had a great laugh over it, and my friend took it all in stride. Now, over 15 years later, they have 3 kids and are still doing fantastic, so it apparently wasn't a sign of things to come, though we still joke about the "cake incident", just not in front of her mom. :)

Fast forward to now. I was reading one of many posts on losing those 'last X pounds' (usually a 5-10 pound range that people obsess over). In general there was some good input, but there was a comment of how /everyone/ has a pre-determined set point/weight that your body will be 'happy' at (heck, Self magazine's website has a calculator so you don't have to mess with that whole deciding for yourself thing!) I've also been hearing a lot of people saying, 'I'm meant to be this way… I was doomed as a child to be fat. I have heart disease/diabetes/cancer in my family, so why bother fighting it?'

Essentially, Zeus, Hera and all the imposing Olympian Gods & Goddesses got together and said ::poof:: "It's your destiny to look this way and weigh this amount, so stop fighting against it, and just take it."

Sorry, I don't buy that... And I'm sure I'm going to get into trouble for it.

This isn't about encouraging over-exercising/dieting, or working towards an unachievable ideal. It's about constantly challenging yourself to achieve things you never thought possible. It's about not letting other people define who you are and what you can do, about not letting other people dictate whether you have the right to make a change.

For me, there came a moment when 'losing weight' suddenly wasn't good enough. I remember, shortly before the wedding, I was enjoying my morning snack of almond butter & celery. I was asked, "Won't you be glad when the wedding is over and you don't have to eat rabbit food any more?" I was floored. Apparently the only reason to eat healthy foods and take care of your body are for a singular purpose, not for ongoing health and well being. And apparently my journey wasn't matching what this person thought I should be doing.

That is one thing that is never in short supply: People's opinions on how you're supposed to live your life. Generally, that opinion involves maintaining the status quo. If you change, it forces the people around you look a little closer at themselves which makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

Right now, I'm getting a ton of complements for how I look and the changes I'm creating in my body. One co-worker mentioned that I'm still me, but better… better attitude, better appearance.

I also know that there will come a time when those that have been oohing and aaaahing will say, "You've gone far enough."

My response will be, "I've just gotten started." There are so many distances to still travel. So many things still to discover about myself.

My only destiny is the one that I choose to create.

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