Tuesday, September 8, 2009

The one where I pitch a small fit


***Warning***

This is pretty much nothing but a rant, and mostly lacking in any sort of political correctness.

All day I was living happily in the afterglow of a wonderfully relaxing weekend with my hubby. Really - it was fantastic and while it was a bit difficult getting into work mode, I felt rested and ready to take on the week. Then it happened... I was... well, read on if you want. But again, you've been warned.

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This is one of those days where I wish weight loss was less... obvious.

Where, if I could just quietly do my thing so no one would notice, and my physical appearence stayed the same, I'd happy. Don't get me wrong. I'm LOVING the changes that I've made in my life - I feel GOOD (OWW! dun na duh na dun....) and I feel strong!

And honestly, I don't mind the compliments - I'm getting more used to just saying "thank you"... And if folks ask questions on how to truly get their health in order- you all know I welcome it!

But seriously, if I'm doing things in a healthy, non-extreme way, what business is it of other people what I eat/don't eat?!

And seriously, if you're going comment about what YOU think I do/don't eat, then you won't mind when I stop by your desk and make snide remarks about YOUR eating habits.

I feel like posting a sign on my desk that says:

1) YES. I have lost weight. I've also gained so much more insight into my life.

It's called self development and radical self acceptance... you should try it.

2) YES. I do know how much I've lost. NO! I'm not going to tell you. It's happened over the past 4 years. But you really only started noticing in the last 12 months. The bigger question is: Why does it matter to YOU what the numbers are on MY scale?

I've gained a healthier lifeSTYLE that I LOVE. How about you?

3) YES! I AM eating a cookie/piece of cake/bagel/REAL sugar/REAL bread/ice cream/fries/soda/insert random, supposedly "forbidden" food.

It's called living in the real world and practicing moderation in all things... including moderation. Again, you should try it.

4) YES! I AM eating again... and will be in a few more hours. Deal. Contrary to popular opinion, you actually have to EAT to reach a HEALTHY weight.

5) NO! I really, really, really don't want to hear about your friend's 2nd cousin 5 times removed that lost a TON of weight eating a carrot every other day. I actually respect my body... and my life... and my health.

Gah!

I got yet ANOTHER remark about what I supposedly do or don't eat.

A co-worker has yummy peanuts in the shell, and the shell is coated in some sort of spicy seasoning. NUM-O.

I was snacky, and grabbed some... seriously, I had 3. Then another co-worker STARES at me.

Me - Ummm... what?

Her - YOU don't eat things like THAT!

Me - I don't? Since when?

Her - Well, I haven't SEEN you eat anything like that in FOREVER!

Me - Really? Guess you haven't been paying that much attention.

Her - But you eat so HEALTHY!

Me *munching happily* - yep... you're right!

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No, this event it's not a huge thing in and of itself, but it brings to mind one simple question: Does it ever stop?!

Does the projection of other people's food/body issues ever truly stop?

If I'm 50 pounds heavier, you think I shouldn't have the cake, but then guilt me into having some so YOU don't offended.

If I'm 50 pounds lighter you think I need _2_ pieces because I'm getting /too/ thin, but then ridicule me if I actually eat it, because it's not 'healthy'.

You're right... it's cake. Sorta like bacon: it's the antithesis of healthy. It's also nummy.

I've made my peace with it. Have you?


2 comments:

Sensacola said...

I am going to assume here that the people asking could probably stand to get a little healthier themselves. They are likely where you were back when you were up and down up and down - the land of 'Lost and Confused and Frustrated'. They see you loosing this weight, shaping up, etc. And yet, there you are, eating something that makes them nose dive. To them, that one piece could very easily turn into two, or instead of a small reasonable slice they have a huge one. They're trying to figure out their own baby steps by asking someone who has found theirs what they are. Guess what, as a physical trainer you'll get asked these same questions all the time, you'll get the same 'No way!' responses from people who are just starting out down the HEALTHY path rather than the I WANNA BE THIN! path. Not always easy to look at things from this angle but sometimes for your own sanity you need to give it a try.

I'm going to make another assumption... you haven't told everyone, everything yet. So you keep having to say things in spurts to random people. What if, you had a 'healthy dinner party' for folks and cooked up a meal for them that was surprisingly healthy and at the end, gave them each little recipe cards for the meal they just ate? You can talk about why you eat every few hours, why you fuel your body so much, and why you fuel it with what you fuel it with.

Yes, I had to get wordy with you... I haven't in a while. LOL. Yes, I also know this was you just needing to vent and rant but, alas, I see that as my cue to be 'helpful' :D

~Diet Goddess~ said...

Oooohhhhh! I can't wait to get to where you are! I'm still at the point where I know I'm getting snide remarks behind my back for eating every 3 hours or so. Doesn't matter that it's fruits n' veggies...it's just the fact that the fat chick in the office is stuffing her face again.

But these are the same ladies that go for a leisurely 20 minute stroll at lunch and think that they've "worked out." I would love to see them try CrossFit.

You continue to inspire me. Thanks!