Thursday, September 4, 2008

Attitude adjustments, Weekend wrap-ups and epiphanies, Oh My!

Yeah, yeah, I know it's Thursday, and on the cusp of another weekend, but I had an awesome weekend that I'm still processing through. It made me realize how far I've come emotionally in the last few months and it's really a cool feeling.

The Hubby (squee!) and I have both gone through serious attitude adjustments, and it's been fabulous! During my MK years, working with my director and having her be sooo patient with me while pouring into me all the positive reinforcement and tools that I needed to succeed. I collected and printed out all these things on the power and purpose behind goals, affirmation, finding that inner flame and passion that drives you, makes you a force to be reckoned with, and keeps you going no matter what.

I heard it all, could spout it back to people, I understood and absorbed it, but never... "got" it. It was always for someone else. I was a great support for people, a great motivator, but not motivated myself.

_Now_, I GET it. (note to self: call Gigi to apologize & thank her!) I'm not sure exactly what happened, what caused the switch to flip from 'plan' to 'do', but it did, and I'm glad. I feel like I've created a great foundation, and have retrained my brain enough where I can focus on my top goals. There's clarity and purpose in my life that I haven't had before and it's scary but cool.

So, this weekend. Had a great conversation with the Hubby (Squee!) on the way to the event about what I want to be when I grow up. :) I have a picture in my brain of what I want to be: Essentially a fitness-nutrition-life coach who helps people get to the same place mentally where I am, and will spill over into their fitness and nutrition to help them be the healthiest person they can be for life. I have been looking at several paths that may get me there, but I'm a bit stuck: one path is to do a Nutrition Science degree (lots of schooling, time and money) and become a Registered Dietitian. Another is to become a Certified Nutrition Counselor (again, lots of schooling, time and money, but not as much, and not as strictly regulated), then there's the Personal Trainer and Nutrition certification (less of all the above, but really not regulated).

I'm really leaning towards the latter, but don't see myself being the drill sergeant trainer that one typically thinks of - I see myself working with clients to create a sustainable fitness and nutrition program. And I had the whole insecure moment of "I'm fat and want to do be a personal trainer?! WTF?! No one would want to work with me!" I really think that, as soon as that thought crossed my brain, Stevie or Veruca gave me a b**ch-slap that basically said, "do what makes you happy and the rest will fall into place."

Alrighty then.

Then we got to the event. I wasn't going to miss it, but wasn't looking forward to it either. I've been very apprehensive of the SCA of late, getting burned by too many people. But this weekend had a couple of purposes. To be there for my Laurel/SCA Ma, as she & her Hubby (SCA Da) were elevated to Baron & Baroness. And I also had the chance to really hang with my apprentice sisters. In the back of my mind, during the conversations about what direction to go career wise, I was mulling over what I wanted to get out of this weekend. And I got it... and more.

I had spent a lot of time thinking, "No one ever helps me. People always want to help so-and-so, and go out of their way to offer help to her. No one pays attention to me." Well, the Universe, in it's cosmic/comic wisdom said, "You're right!"


Ok, lets do this a bit different, shall we? "Universe, this is what I want, K? thxbai!"

Universe says, "Cool! Thanks for asking, here ya go."

I ended up having several great conversations, getting a lot of encouragement and ideas from folks that I respect and admire for their talents and sheer involvement and production. It rocked! It also made me realize that attitude really IS everything.

I was also happy - but not really surprised - that I didn't gain weight over the weekend. Events in general are difficult because there's yummy drinks and snackies to be had, and this one had someone else in charge of food all together. I made my peace with it all, enjoyed the company and had what I needed and moved on.

Oh, and my fabulously wonderful Hubby (squee!) said those 4 little words that made my heart get all fluttery: Let's get a maid!


All in all, very satisfying and has given me a lot to think about

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