Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The worst is yet to come.


A lady on one of my groups commented how, as much as she's working at things, they seem to just keep getting worse and worse. So, here YOU are... You're getting started on your new healthy, financially independent, clutter free life and I have one thing to tell you: It's gonna get a whole lot worse before it gets better.

Aren't I just a little ray of sunshine today? :)



Let me back up a bit. My friends comment got me thinking about the times I would start whatever self improvement project and it seemed like the more I did, the more I focused, the more I grasped at the information and tried to reign in my life, the more it seemed to hemorrhage out of control. I would start eating healthier and/or exercising and I would feel worse, and get sick, and a health issue would pop up. Then I'd start decluttering my house only to see a bigger and bigger mess. Finances... Oy! don't even get me started on that big raging river of doom!

At the beginning it was always out of my control crazy! Problem is that it would scare me and I'd stop & run away. Ignorance is bliss doncha know?!

Now that I'm just past the mess and the out of control phase, I understand what it was. Self awareness. When you've been operating on auto pilot you don't notice all the holes that have developed in your life. You handed the keys over to someone else (Your inner brat, perhaps?) and were unaware of the habits that you'd developed.

The problem starts when you disengage the auto pilot and start becoming aware of your surroundings. Your first thought is, "How did I get here?!?! How did this happen?!" Then you panic, try to do something, anything, to reverse the cycle, and get frustrated, overwhelmed, and really angry at yourself for not only letting this life happen, but being seemingly powerless to stop.

Thing is, it takes a while to create order from chaos. It gets a whole lot messier before it starts to get pretty. Think about trying to clean out a overstuffed storage shed: You have to pull out everything, put the stuff in different piles - donate, trash, recycle, etc.... it ends up taking over more space than before and looks horrible! But eventually one pile goes away and you see a bit of progress... then the next pile goes, and finally the last one, and you're left with a big, gleaming empty area.

Most people get stuck in the messier phase - the piles everywhere and no hope of seeing daylight - when they're getting soooo close to seeing the pretty part. I know I did that MANY times! I would get overwhelmed by the sudden awareness of the mess I'd gotten into, work a bit, then give up, only to have things get even worse.



There's a problem with opening the Self Awareness door - every time you do, it sheds a little bit more light into your life till you just can't be satisfied with ignorance any more. Some may call that moment rock bottom, some may call it the turning point.

What ever you call it, THAT is the moment you will finally be willing to take a deep breath, face the situation head on, and take the baby steps that are necessary to create lifelong changes in your life.

As you embark, or continue on your journey, remember to take a step back once in a while, see where you are, how far you've come, and realize you are much closer to the finish line than you think.




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