Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Situation: Normal; All F*cked Up.

Bless me dear non-existent readers. It has been over 6 years since my last post

Over the past 6 years, I’ve been tempted to re-vist and reboot this blog. But it never seemed the right time to pour things out. Partly because so much has changed in the last few years, that the previous focus of the blog doesn’t apply as much. Well, in a way it does because I’ve always held the platform that it’s all related - change in your life uses the same principles, and it doesn’t matter where you find the inspiration as long as it helps reinforce the changes you’re making, and also clears the path in front of you.

But the time is right for now, so I’m jumping in.

I won’t rehash the last 6 years, because if I did, we’d be here for days and days, and I don’t have the brain power or memory to go over that… but here’s the highlights:

  • Lost a few people that I loved and were very close to, including my dad. Some were lost  to “natural” causes, some because life became too much. 
  • I crashed. I burned out. I had a breakdown. Whatever you want to call it, I overdid and my body all but shut down on me. Adrenals, thyroid, hormones - all crashed and went haywire.
  • I got a ‘new’ diagnosis to go with my hypothyroidism and chronic fatigue: Fibromyalgia.
  • My best friend, followed by my husband got diagnosed before me with Fibromyalgia.
  • My husband, after 2 years, was finally approved for SSDI 
  • We moved from our town house in the middle of everything, to an older home, out in the middle of nowhere. There’s some good and bad, but it’s also allowed us some peace, quiet, and puppies.
  • I had to leave a job I loved of 10+ years, to take a job I hated for a year, to bring me to a job I love for the last 2 years.
  • My focus became less on “getting fit” and “losing weight” to just surviving and attempting to heal. Now that I’m at a point of healing inside and out. Now that’s my focus - finding what works for the husband and I, to bring about healing to our physical bodies, our physical spaces, and our emotional lives

I’m sure there’s a whole lot more, and some will be touched upon as we go, but that kind of brings things up to speed.

So... how do I move forward? Well, like many people, I’m using my blog for accountability. If you learn something along the way, that’s awesome, but in general this is my space to blab on about what’s going on with me, what I’m focusing on, and what I’m learning along the way. I realized that the timing to jump back in was right when I started to use one of the FB groups I’m on as my personal blog… Yeah, they are super supportive, but seriously, it’s not my group. LOL!

What now? I have no idea, but I do know that what’s been knocking around my brain is to share what I’m doing to bring about the above mentioned healing. And I’m starting now - in December. Not in January when all the cool kids do it. Because I know that if I wait, it’ll never happen. If I start now, I’ll have some better footing to keep going.

What am I working on? For the last 18-ish months, the hubs and I have been on a declutter kick. I read the Marie Kondo book, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, and I totally drank the Kool-aid and jumped in. It’s the first time in my LIFE that I’ve been able to release my stuff into the wild without a second thought. It has been amazing.

But I’ve floundered. I’ve stopped and started. I didn’t complete some categories. Then life happened and I just stopped. Then life happened that’s forced us to pack up of our belongings for a mass exterminator project in the house. And now we’re forced really cull through what is worth keeping, and what isn’t. Which is where we are now.

I decided that, for the month of December, my goal is to get the house put back together and also established habits that keep the house from spiraling out of control. Also, with the abundance of stuff, I’m working on using up what I have.

So far it’s working.

What’s been helping me on this path are these resources:

As I said, I’ll be sharing what I learn, things I’ve done, and other random bits of info, on a schedule that my spoonie brain and time allow. And I will be considering if the blog will stay put, or move to some other platform.

Till then, Monkey on!

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