Thoughts for Thursday - The A-ha! Edition

This is a drive by blogging because I have too much bouncing around my brain to leave it there. LOL!

I've had a few moments of reading something a hundred times, then the 101th time I read it, thought "OH! /That's/ what it means!" moment? Obviously it's because I'm at a point where I need to read/hear it, and since I"m so into sharing, I thought others may be at a similar place and benfit from hearing it as well.

"To take the first step in faith, you don't have to see the whole staircase: just take the first step." Martin Luther King, Jr.

Most times I saw this, I focused on the last part: just take the first step. Stop procrastiating, start to channel your inner Nike ad and Just DO IT!

Then I picked up on that middle bit: You don't have to see the whole staircase.

You see, I'm a fact finder. When I embark on something new or different, I gather all the info (to the point of overload usually) and either I get fed up, frustrated, or fired up and plow through. I usually get stuck in the 'what if' cycle and fixate on silly, nit-picky details that really don't mean a lot in the grander scheme of things.

Basically, I not only had to /see/ the whole staircase, but I had to see the plans, build it, inspect every inch and walk it a few times before I'd be willing to test the first step.

To use another metaphor: Horse - snoozin' in the barn. Cart - down at market all unloaded.

Where does it get me? Absolutley nowhere. I get wrapped up in the perfectionist, all or nothing thinking that leaves me _looking_ like I'm doing something, but really, the wheels are just spinning and I'm getting burned out.

Solution: Make a decision, get a little bit of info to get you started, and take that first step. Then get a little more info and take the next one. Have faith that you'll have the resources and support you need, when you need it, down the road. In the mean time, stop using the details as an excuse to not get started.

"Love Your Neighbor As Yourself"

This one has been niggling at my brain for a while. The husband & I recently found a church that we now call home and the pastor always has an amazing message to deliver. He's used this phrase a few times and I started to get the full impact of it.

I was going to put the specific book/verse only to find out that there are at least/ 8 times it's used in the bible spefically in that form. ( www.believers.org/believe/bel208.htm has references to the verses plus a few more in one handy dandy place) And not to mention all the similar type phrases that are sprinkled throughout it. I think this is a phrase that we've all heard, regardless if you're a Sunday school graduate or not.

We all get the first part: Love your neighbor. Similar to the "do unto others" message, be nice to other people.

But what about that last bit? As YOURSELF.

Think about it for a second: The message isn't to love others/treat others BETTER than yourself. Nope. It's all about putting yourself on the SAME level as those around you.

How many women put themselves on the way bottom of the priority list? (that is, if they've even made it on the list in the first place.) How many times have you gushed and loaded compliments on a total stranger or your best friend, only to say something hurtful to yourself in public or the privacy of your own brain?

I know I'm guilty of it.

The Ah-ha! of it is this: If you don't love and respect yourself & treat yourself well, how can you give another the love and respect they deserve?

Taking care of yourself the same as you take care of others isn't selfish. It's survival.

Eating well, moving your body, getting rest, laughing and speaking kindly to yourself are the recipe to keeping your internal batteries charged so you /can/ be a good friend, sister/brother, wife/husband, mother/father.

You (yes, YOU!) are an amazing person! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise - including yourself.

Thoughts for Thursday: The hardest step

Motivation...it's a fickle thing.

Sometimes your goal is burning brightly in your brain and your heart, making you so excited you can hardly sleep. You have no trouble sticking to the plan because you are soooo motivated to keep moving forward.

Other times... not so much.

But you have to take that first step.

These last two weeks have been in the "not so much" category. (Points to the "Smackdown" blog from last week)

Is it that I'm not excited about my goals? That I don't want to accomplish my Great Things? It's not that at all.

It's more the fact that I'm human and sometimes the Great Things get trumped by the Little Things, which takes energy away from the Great Things.

Some days I love the tracking and monitoring and being proactive. Some days I just wanna say scr$w it.

And that makes the first step a really, really hard one to take.

When I feel the scr$w it times coming on, I scale back... this week, for example, I absolved myself of any guilt of not getting to the gym 4 days, and being perfectly content with my 2 treadmill runs and joining the training group on Saturday. After all, I have fun family time to focus on and _finally_, after 2-3 weeks of hideous allergy issues (like having to use my inhaler for the first time in well over a year!) the paper ran a feature declaring that Tucson is having the Worst. (and earliest). Allergy. Season. E-V-A-R! Duh... I coulda told 'em that!

This morning, that first step was a doozie!

Way back when I was first getting myself into the exercise habit, and keeping focused on the end goal (aka looking hawt in my weddin' dress - by the way, NEVER discount the power of a "superficial" goal! You can say you're doing it to get healthy all you want, but really, what's more motivating most times: Being healthy or lookin' good in your jeans?)

I would have arguments in my head with my inner princesses. Usually the adult me wanted to sleep in, the princess me's wanted to get my butt out the door and on the road to hawtness.

This morning, the princesses were sound asleep and the inner argument was with myself.

I should get more rest so I don't wear myself down and get sick. *sniff*

I should get my butt to the gym so I don't keel over on the training run Saturday morning. *snuff*

Then repeat.

Ultimately I took that first step.

I got up and out of bed (dragging sniffy and snuffy with me) and the plan that I would do 3 instead of 4 intervals, cutting the workout short by about 5 minutes.

At the gym, I stood on the treadmill, staring at the bright green "START" button. Just had to push it to get it started... Gah! Ok fine. I pushed the button.

I took the first step... and the second. By 10 minutes in, my coffee started to work and I felt a little perkier. By 15 minutes in, I was a Supah-Stah!

By my final 25th minute I was sweaty and tired, but ready to take on the world.

I just had to take that first step.

Dinner Dilemma: Solved!

And I had to email my dad to tell him what was on the menu.

Why would I do that?

I'm glad you asked - funny story, actually.

Out of all the memories I have from the past *mumblemumble* years, there is one that stands out above all others.

And really, considering I can barely remember what I did an hour ago, that's saying a LOT! LOL!!!

Growing up, I was blessed to have a mom with mad cooking skills and she exercised those skills with abandon. While we would always have nummy food any night of the week, it was Friday night dinner that reigned supreme!

You see, Friday night was the night reserved for the fun foods: Spaghetti! Taco's! Burgers & OMG nummy homemade fries! Pizza (homemade, of course!)!

It was The Night. It was worthy of missing sleep overs for. It was the thing that made me not mind being late to high school football games to hang out with my friends.

Except for that night... the dreaded night.

I came home from school but wasn't met with any sort of fabulous baking/greasy/tomato-y type of smells... I was perplexed.

I went to the kitchen to see a pot on the stove... but nary a sauce or stick of pasta was to be found.

"Um..." I asked nonchalantly, "So... what's for dinner."

My mom replied, ever so casually, "Soup."

Before I could engage my brain/mouth filter... oh wait, I was a pre-teen, I hadn't developed a brain/mouth filter yet... I went on a good 5 minute tirade. "SOUP?!?!?" I exclaimed.

"SOOOUP!?! It's Friday! We doing have soooooop on Fridays! Sooooup?!? Who heard of having soooooup on a Friday! Seriously! It's not even anything chili or clam chowder!"

Dad got home and I confronted him: "We're having SOOOOUP!"

Expecting outrage for my cause, all I got was, "Oh, sounds good."

In my pre-teen dramatic way, I stormed around for a bit longer, probably went to my room and pouted before I finally went down and begrudgingly ate my sooooup.

Needless to say that we never had sooooup again on a Friday night while I was living at home.

And the rare occassion that I have sooooup on a Friday, I have to call my parents so we can have a good giggle.

So... one guess what I'm having for dinner tonight?

Friday Free For All

(that's really just a nice way of saying that I'm about to share the random jumble of things that have been bouncing around my head. ;)

Awesome quote that I had to share... Apply it to everything - money, fitness, health, hearth, home, heart.

"Today is the first day of the rest of your life. So don't dwell on past mistakes, that willl get you nowhere. Instead, focus on what you can and will do today, tomorrow, and the rest of your life, and all of the great things that will happen because of your actions. Get strong, be strong, stay strong. Have a great weekend and come back on Monday ready to tear it up." - Craig Ballentine

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A very special shout out to Miz "Runs with a Tiara/tutu" Fit [ www.MizFitonline.com and www.twofitchicks.org ] Carla Birnberg who is Orlando bound to run in the Disney Princess 1/2 Marathon on Sunday.

I have expressed several times how much I *heart* MisFit. And listening to one of the latest podcasts about her training, I felt like she was was talking to me.

True to her "Unapologetically Myself" creed, she basically admitted not liking the whole process. She's committed to the 1/2 marathon, excited to do it, and super excited for it to be over. In her words, "I'm a Lifter, not a Runner." Then, to paraphrase, added that she will never run a marathon, and she's ok with that.

It's a timely message to me because last night I made the realization that I, too, am not a capital "R" Runner.

Now, before I get a slew of comments about anyone who runs/jogs/gimps along is a runner, lemme say I don't disagree with you. In fact, I do _now_ consider myself a runner (little "r").

Considering I was someone who vowed they would NEVER run unless being chased by Zombies (ok, don't need to run, Zombies are slow ;) or a rabid wild animal (squirrels can be scary, ya know!) it's a biiiig step to say that I am a runner.

In fact, I love to run... once in a while. As part of my overall fitness regimine.

What I'm learning is that I hate to Run. As in the I have to do it because I have a race coming up and need to do x, y and z runs to accomplish that.

I know! As much as I am all about the 'stay focused on your goals and act according to the boundries of those goals', I don't like getting caught up in the have to/must/need to aspect of it rather than just living it.

I'm working my way back to the "just mixin' it up and adding in new workout stuffs to what I normally do" mindset I had for my first 5K so I can get back to livin' it, lovin' it, and rockin' it, rather than dreadin' it.

Which means I may or may not do another competitive run after this. And there's a 99.999% chance I won't ever consider/train for/enter/participate in anything more than 5-10K.

And I'm ok with that.

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Speaking of rockin' it... my pants?

Size 8!

::strikes a SUPAHSTAH pose::

No lonely pants for me today!

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And finally, for the first time in ages I have absolutely no clue what to make for dinner. Thoughts? Suggestions?

March Madness!

So, first off, a BIIIIG shout out to my Canadian Peeps!!! Congrats on getting the most Gold Medals of all the Olympics, and for the Gold in Women's Hockey and the Gold & Silver in Men's hockey (I know the folks who won the silver were wearing USA uniforms, but really, we all know they were Canadian ;)

Secondly, how the heck did it get to be March 1st?!?! Seriously, it was /just/ February 1st! I was fired up! I was focused! I... well, I didn't fail... though I didn't do all that great either.

Here's my Feburary 'report card':

-Tightening up my eating by weighing and measuring my food to ensure I'm getting appropriate amounts of carbs, fat & protein

*I did track my food several times during Feb., which is more than I had done in quite a while. I give myself a C for Consistency.

- Eating a wide variety of raw and cooked veggies, limiting my grains, and enjoying lean protein.

*Got that covered! While this past weekend was seriously lacking in green stuff, I felt very good about my eating. Grade: B+

- Doing 5 workout sessions a week - 4 crossfit workouts + 1 walk/run session to prepare myself for my upcoming 5K

*Yeah, not so much. Dealing with stress and sinus issues kept me, for the most part, at 4 workouts a week. Grade: B for keeping the minimum.

- Allow myself to 1 adult beverage a week (2 for the hubby's b-day dinner) While I enjoy sharing a beverage with my hubby, more than this is counter productive to achieving my short term goals.

*::blush:: see the note above. Stress, tired, and a whole lotta "Meh, whatever" lead to at least 2 on the weekends... the upside is I did keep it to the weekends. Grade: C

- Allow myself 1-2 desserts a week

*FAIL! LOL! Sometimes the sugary, carby goodness win. Grade: D

- I maximize my fat burning potential by creating an efficent calorie deficit though exercise and controled food portions.

*I actually did pretty well with this one. My eating (despite the dessert/beverage blips) still has me at a decent but not overly agressive calorie deficit. Grade: B+

- I continue to work through, and remove limiting beliefs that keep popping up and blocking my success.

*Be careful what you wish for! There were a lot of things that popped up this month and things are still lingering. I did well at identifying the issues, and am spending some brain power each day working through them. Grade: A

-At the end of the month, I am excited to see the scale reflect 5 pounds of pure fat gone from my body forever

*This one I can't answer since I refuse to step on the scale until next weekend. Again, stress, AF, and lingering limiting beliefs aren't condusive to seeing the scale as a tool rather than the enemy right now.

Overall grade: B/B+

That leaves me looking forward to March and the goals that will bring me to the end of my first 12 week cycle of 2010!

Workouts: This is where the fun stuff happens (hence the March Madness theme. LOL!)

1) My big goal is to complete all the "Girl" workouts from the CrossFit site.

I was initially going to do them in order but figured, with several pull-up heavy workouts, it was an equation for overtraining... so I'll be mixing them up so that I only have 2 workouts with pull-ups each week, 4 total.

2) Adding in _3_ training runs to get in shape for my upcoming 5K.
Before anyone (including myself) freaks out about the increase in volume the up side is that most of the Cross Fit workouts are short and sweet, as are the initial 5K training runs. I had my first "group" run on Saturday and had a blast. They handed out their suggested training plans and was instantly in love - 3 sessions a week (including the Saturday one) and they start out at 15 min. the first week, 20 the next, and doesn't go over 30 minutes. Now THAT I can handle.

Nutrition - keep on keeping on:

3) I continue to enjoy a wide variety of fruits and veggies, lean protein and healthy fats. Grains are enjoyed in moderation.

4) I enjoy up to 1 adult beverage each week. Reaching my weight and fitness goal is important to me and alcohol hinders my progress towards those goals.

5) I enjoy 1-2 desserts a week. I choose the quality and quantity of these items wisely and based on special occassions, not on emotions.

Mental stuff

6) Continue to identify and work through limiting beliefs that emerge as part of this process.

I am looking forward to my fitness level increasing, and seeing the scale reflect the weight of 140 pounds and my measurements reflecting a drop of at least 2% of body fat.